This world, this person
by whitelilies
Summary: .::78 tarot claim::. 1. Miriallia hasn't forgiven Athrun for killing Tolle and wonders why Kira has.


**Title:** Forgiveness  
**Characters:** Miriallia, Kira, Athrun, Dearka  
**Prompt:** Six of Cups  
**Rating:** PG  
**A/N**: I think I'm finally back to writing~ As always, constructive criticism is always welcome :D  
**Summary:** Miriallia hasn't forgiven Athrun for killing Tolle and wonders why Kira has.

* * *

As the sun beats down on Orb, Miriallia Haww, photographer and information agent for Terminal, snaps pictures of the setting sun.

There aren't many people around, and she is glad. Solitude is the best atmosphere to work in. She does wonder where Kira has taken the children, though. There are too many kids for the area to be quiet.

Looking over to her right, the woman spots the beach house Cagalli gave to her brother. It is a beautiful mahogany building and spacious too. Shaking her head, the brunette continues her task. The writer she works for this month wants the images developed the day after tomorrow.

On jobs like these, she is reminded of Tolle. The slender being slouches down on a knee and places the sleek camera on it. She closes her eyes and instantly remembers the smiling boy.

His brown hair would always be messy and she'd always have to tidy it, even his clothes time to time. His happy spirit constantly brought smiles to others, especially Kira, the shyest boy in school. She will always miss that smile.

Sighing, Miriallia opens her eyes and continues work. She can't be sidetracked or there won't be pay for two weeks.

A few hours later, the brunette packs her equipment and starts to walk towards her car. A thin layer of orange remains in the sky and reminds her of the time when Ssigh took them to his summer home for spring vacation. It seems like a long time ago…

Why does time pass by so quickly? Miriallia opens the car door and tucks her equipment away underneath the seat. She doesn't want attention to be directed on the backseat because of it.

As she sits in the driver's seat, the woman sighs and leans back against the head rest, thinking.

Why did greed have to be a part of human nature? So much damage has been caused, leaving fear and distress in the world. She knows the current Orb Representatives are working hard to restore the country to its former state especially Cagalli Yula Attha considering she is the Head Representative.

Miriallia wonders how someone the same age as her is able to handle the pressure of being a leader. She decides she will never be able to do what the blonde does. The brunette is the type of person who stays in the background, helping.

Shaking her head, the woman starts the engine and drives to the furthest café she knows of. She needs coffee and needs to be away from Orb for awhile.

Eventually she ends up at the same place as six months ago. It is this building where she met Athrun, the man who killed Tolle. She surprised herself that day by keeping calm in his presence. Miriallia didn't realize she was still angry at him for taking away the one man she truly cared for.

When he asked about Dearka, she didn't say anything because there wasn't much to say. They tried to support a relationship but it didn't work out in the end. He wasn't Tolle…

Miriallia stops the car and stays still for a moment. She then looks to the passenger seat. She grins when seeing a faded image of Tolle, laughing. He was so young…

Has she forgiven Athrun? The brunette looks at the steering wheel for a few moments and then leaves the car with a cynical mind. Tolle never killed anyone before, unlike Athrun. Why was Tolle the one to leave?

A customer leaves, keeping the door open until she enters. She thanks him and finds a table near the window. The waitress who serves her hosts a large smile, displaying perfect white teeth. Her voice is coated with sugar and her hair pinker than Lacus'.

After ordering a cup of coffee – and ignoring the attempt the other makes at a conversation – Miriallia lets her gaze rest on the stars outside. Six months ago, she among those stars, fighting her second war.

There she saw Dearka again, for the first time after they broke up. He grinned and the atmosphere wasn't as tense as she thought it would be. The blonde has a talent for keeping a cheery aura. It must have developed after spending so much time with Yzak.

She smiles. Dearka is a good friend to have. Right now, Miriallia wishes he would sit across from her, complaining and joking about everything.

"Here you are. Enjoy."

The waitress places the cup on the table with a slight thud, showing her minor irritation. The brunette holds back the urge to roll her eyes. She takes the mug into her hands and sips the coffee.

Her thoughts start to drift to hidden questions, causing her anger level to rise. _Why_ did Kira forgive Athrun for killing his other best friend? Tolle was always there for Kira whenever someone hassled him about his Co-ordinator status. Ever since Kira became a citizen of Orb, Tolle was the one to aid Kira in any way possible, seeing him as a younger brother.

She wants to know why.

* * *

"Oh, Miriallia, what a wonderful surprise."

A woman with purple hair smiles at Miriallia. She hasn't seen the young woman in nearly two years. Caridad welcomes her into the mansion and seats her in the living room.

She then leaves the room to fetch Kira and some refreshments. Miriallia looks around and finds pictures of Athrun, Lacus, Cagalli and Kira in assorted frames. Both Kira and Athrun are in a frame, Cagalli and Kira in another one, and Lacus and Kira with the children are set atop the fireplace.

There are other pictures of people she doesn't recognize until her eyes reach the end of the white surface. Miriallia stands up and walks over to the photograph which catches her attention.

It is one of the group before the invasion on Orb. Kuzzey, Tolle, Kira, Ssigh and she are in it. They are sitting on top of a grassy hill, waiting for Fllay to come out of her class. Miriallia and Tolle knew about his crush.

"Miriallia, how are you?"

She turns towards the deep and familiar voice. In the doorway stands a taller and tanner Kira than she remembers. Grinning, the young woman strides to him and gives him a hug.

Miriallia hasn't been able to contact Kuzzey and Ssigh is in another country, working as an engineer. The only friend she has left in Orb is Kira although, he will be leaving to the PLANTS soon…

"I'm alright. How about you?"

She hints towards his mental health and he catches on. The brunette knows he had a hard time accepting his role in the recent wars. Lacus has helped him and for the woman's effort, Miriallia is thankful.

"I'm…doing better."

He pulls her to the couch as his mother joins them with a tray. On it are cups of Miriallia's and Kira's favourite tea, cookies and small cakes.

"This is all we have at the moment, dear. I hope you don't mind."

Caridad seems a flustered and Miriallia smiles, saying she doesn't at all. With a small laugh, she pats Kira head and leaves the two alone, saying she is going to check on the children.

Nothing is said between the two young adults as they reminisce the days everyone would go to Kira's house to eat and relax.

"Have you seen anybody else lately?"

Kira asks; he's been out of touch with Ssigh for almost three years. He and Kuzzey weren't the best of friends but Kira misses him as well.

"No, I don't know where Kuzzey's gone and Ssigh's in Argentina. It's difficult to contact him."

"I…see."

A torrent of sorrow passes through the man. Apart from his family and Miriallia, there isn't evidence of his prior life. The home they lived in was blown apart, leaving nothing. The woman places a hand softly on his shoulder and he gazes at her. She holds her smile.

"I know what you're thinking but what's done is done. Nothing can be done about it now. You have new friends and a new family member; they are a chief part of your life now. Concentrate on them. If I'm able to get to Kuzzey or Ssigh, I'll definitely give you a call."

He nods, accepting Miriallia's words. At the end of the week, he would be leaving to PLANTS and joining ZAFT. Doing so goes against his beliefs but he is going for Lacus, the woman who has stood by his side for three years.

"Thank you. And how is Dearka?"

Miriallia's smile weavers and she looks away. Kira wasn't there when she told the crew she dumped him.

"I'm not sure; I haven't seen him in about six months."

Kira raises a brow. "Oh…"

"Hn. He wasn't…the right one."

"Oh…how long did you two…"

"About three months, I think."

Kira blinks and frowns slightly. He thinks that is too short a time to know if someone is the right one or not. He and Fllay were together for nearly a year before he broke off their relationship.

"He started complaining too much about everything."

"I…see…"

Kira isn't familiar with talking about ex-boyfriends with girls except Cagalli but she doesn't count. Usually, war and peace are his conversation topics of choice.

But from what he heard about Dearka from Athrun, is that he only lets himself loose around those who he feels comfortable with. During the time he spent on the Archangel, Kira heard about his crush and dedication to Miriallia.

"He would listen to what I had to say but…"

Kira understands. She wasn't fully over Tolle when agreeing to date Dearka. Wrong timing. He doesn't mention that Dearka would be stopping by later on today. The ZAFT soldier is doing a favour for Athrun by telling Kira the attitudes and behaviours of Co-ordinators in PLANTS.

Suddenly, the atmosphere isn't as light as before. The cheerful Miriallia who came back to the Archangel seems to have disappeared. He had gotten the impression she was over Tolle when he brought her to the ship…

"Miriallia…Tolle is gone."

He tries to speak softly. Her once bright eyes, now a dull green, holds his. She accepts he is gone and Kira seems to be misunderstanding her. She hasn't accepted Athrun.

"Kira, Tolle is gone because of Athrun."

He freezes as her eyes restrain spite. She harbours hate towards Athrun? Never before has he seen Miriallia in such a state. She is supposed to be the happy girl, the girl who gets everyone's spirits up when in a time of depression.

"He killed Tolle."

Her voice is barely a whisper. But there are no tears. Kira hurts inside. He knows Athrun killed one of his best friends but he accepted it…

"How could you forgive him, Kira?"

Her sadness reaches to him and he doesn't know how to explain. They don't speak until Kira chooses his words carefully.

"I-I killed Nicol, Athrun's friend."

Miriallia listens.

"He was angry; angry I killed one of his close friends. When a person is angry, Miriallia, anything can happen. Unfortunately, Tolle was there on that day we fought. Athrun's anger with me couldn't be controlled…"

"Kira, you didn't have a choice!" The brunette recalled the pilot and the battle, "He intersected your path…Athrun, Athrun could have held back. I held back…"

Her raised voice lowers to a whisper again as she remembers the time she almost killed Dearka. She was angry too but she held back, why couldn't he?

Kira stands and pivots in front of her. He kneels on one knee and takes her hands in his. He starts to talk softly, hoping the children aren't listening.

"Fllay and Ssigh stopped you that day. Indirectly, but she did." She looks away. "Deep inside, you didn't want to kill Dearka but you almost did. Had both of them not stopped you, then Dearka might not have survived. Then those important to him would not be happy with you.

"No one else was there to stop Athrun that day. There wasn't anybody to help him control his anger. If somebody besides me was there, then Tolle would've have been alive today.

"In a war, Miriallia, people die. You know this. Fllay, Tolle, Nicol, Nartale-san, those are just the people we know who passed away. The people who killed them might not have been able to control themselves. This is why war needs to be stopped.

"If not, then who else will lose control and kill someone important to another? And you've been there, Miriallia. I've been there. We need to forgive those who killed because they are only human. To forgive others releases you more than them."

She starts to shake, the emotions she hid for two years begin to show. Her head tilts down, not allowing Kira to see her face. But she is more controlled now and when she looks up, her tears are absent.

The brunette squeezes his hand in silent appreciation. The thought of losing control never passed her mind.

They stay still; not a sound is heard.

Until the door bell rings.

Someone answers it, presumably Caridad. She chats with the visitor as Miriallia and Kira stand. The woman wants to leave and she gives Kira a tiny, forced smile and a light hug.

"I'll come see you before you leave."

"I would like that."

He smiles too, although his is genuine. He places a hand on her shoulder before leading her towards the door. She follows, eyes fixed on the floor and no smile. She received an answer -which she doesn't think completely answers her question - and now it's time to finish her photography.

"Oh, Dearka, welcome."

Miriallia blinks and looks up. Caridad is gone and Kira is holding the handle of the door. Standing in front of him is a matured Dearka Elsman. The blonde has a grin on his face and is dressed in civilian clothes.

He looks past Kira and is surprised to see Miriallia. They both look at each other, forgetting about Kira. She notices a faded line by his eye she never noticed before. It's her fault that is there.

Kira asks Dearka to sit down before excusing himself to get something.

"Miriallia, um, haven't seen you in awhile. How've you-"

Before Dearka's able to finish his sentence, Miriallia walks to him and hugs him calmly. She feels this is the only thing she can do.

"I'm sorry."

He'd be lying to himself if he says he isn't shocked or confused. Is she sorry for breaking up with him? Not saying anything, he hugs her back.

He's learned to keep his mouth shut.


End file.
